Tuesday, December 22, 2009

what the a?

so what do u call the next decade?

10, 11, 12 are different
the teens will be the teens
but what about the whole thing

just a thought before the year ends

my resolution is to quit eating double front chicken
damn fried chicked is sooo good
plus whiskey oh
and a great bar tender
cut down on that

living alone is great again
four walls to the outside
i listen to music fuckin loud
mostly the phish phazeee
n my records too

bishop, ca trip is coming up in the new year
jan 2-15. sickk
got a new pad from moonclimbing.com
and new sportiva's
fresshhhh
until the next.......

oh p.s. I AM SINGLE

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

just another love tale
nothings over yet
but some time off is needed
stress
this sucks when this shit happens
i am dumb
i want to smoke a smoke
god i think i might go get a smoke
jeebus christ.

Friday, September 25, 2009

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

duders n duder-ettes
emotions in starting relationships suck
you speak what you say
think that you think, then say
that what you should do.
i do it
i still am confused at where she stands
kissing at the end of the night must mean something
but emotions were different
oh, and i am a sweaty man
not nervous but just when sort of nervous, i sweat
haha, not a whole lot but a little
anyways, yea, relationships
one day to the next r effin mind blowers
u never really know whats going on
but you think you do
knowing my mind and how it works and worked
you never really know whats going on
i am sure i have "nothing" to worry about
but i do
cuz thats what i do.
i am an avid kisser
i am a cudd-a-ler
thats me. soooooo
hopefully things work out,
and nighty night

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Samsquinches grad pics of may


me at what i did best in the house.
made laughter and smiles every second i could


my first time ever takin a shot.... ha





my sweet pearly whites




me saying, "what the eff handa"


boy
do i
miss that house


Friday, August 7, 2009

Mac-N-Cheese Mia


my niece is growing up
she will eat with a fork
for about 2 bites
then its "hand-on eating" for now on

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

hehehaha


old band pic from 3 1/2 years ago
lots of pabst
lots of crazy fun
i love how creep each individual is
i have wierd creepy long hair
doug is still little dougy
aaron is still smokin cigs
and
greeny is still greeny

Friday, July 24, 2009

workin on a railroad

nothing like cooking breakfast
at a bed and breakfast
for people that want breakfast
and picky breakfast people too
mostly old but a few youngins

love is a losing game

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

lankee eff-er

i always think i need to lose weight
or body fat per-say
until i see my skinny ass



but then
i think
ummm..
hmmm
i guess i should lose some body weight
it'd do me some good
and i also look like a resemblance of
Peter Parker=Scott Parker

Saturday, July 11, 2009

its my birthday

a long 25 years ago
my mother forced me out
all 10 lb 6 ounces
oucherssssss
but i grew up and squished up to be
6'2"1/2 feet
159 lbs
small and fat
to tall and skinny
so my day
yes my day
so far has consisted of
-a mickeys 40 at 12 last night
-sleep
-dream about dream girl #23
-wake up and go to the farmers market
-to play bluegrass and make 21 dollars for playin 1 1/2 hours
-double vodka redbull at the oldpost
-4 1/2 bloody mary's at snowbowl
-and i nice tasty pizza
-a sweet chocolate cake from nikki and cassi
-feel full and come home
-power nap and now round 2
-i got 4 more hours of 7/11 so i will make it good
-hopefully not remember past 12:00
yeaaaa

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Dm

dreamer, i am, id say
almost lisk a d minor chord
that sound of that chord is
dark
sad
ewwww-ee
ya know
and two nights ago
i woke up with that d minor chord
raging in my mind
and all day
and yesterday
and today
d minor
ahhh
d minor
if you dont know or how
go listen to an acoustic version of d minor
it is sad
dark
and i dont know about you but
my body gets a bad warm feeling
does urs?
that d minor was set off by nothing that happened
a freakin thought
hmm
yes
hmm
is that thought created by a dream
sometimes and usually i have major chord dreams
and those sound happy
go play an Amaj chord or even a Bb maj
yea
happy right
now go back to that Dm
eeewwwww
gross
id say
i am hoping that this Dm does not proceed
towards my birthday
which is on saturday the 11th
yes, the greatest day ever
7/11
but right now, i could actually go out
in style too
by a quarter old= 25 years
and just stop
what else do i have to do
well yes live and love
but i will not go out with out living the love of life
so u and i are lucky,
theres no
"going out in style"
this time
but i am blue
like the D minor chord
blue as a dimmer dark blue
thats not that blue but blue
ya know
hopefully
i will hear Gmaj
and be Gmaj
cuz all these last years of 4 or so
holy shat
i have been nothing but smiles
no anger now or then
but now and only i feel sad
SAD as in D flat minor now
ewwwwwww

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

ahhh

ahhh.
i say
seriously
i cant really take it
wyoming lady-eeee
on an old plain farm
always waiting for a
lone-leeeee heart
i sang
and i did
but this girl is hung up
hung up and a damn douche
dooo-shay
i'd say
but who knows
were both from gillette, wyo
so she must have an "against"
and i have a nothing
frick
frick-in-a

Sunday, July 5, 2009

still old

now i know im old
my nose itched and i couldnt figure it out
then i caught a hair and it hurt
so guess what
i trimmed a nose hair
ha
ha
ha
i told you i am getting old
ewwwww

Friday, July 3, 2009

official date

so yesterday.
i went on basicallly
my 1st and once and only date
and what u call date
is..
not really knowing
and
not sure what will happen
and
feels like a blind date
sorta
but...
.
.
it went well
and she is not my type
ha
she is pastor's daughter
if i am even spelling that right
and not tall
and not too skinny
what the eff scott
usually
i dont do this
.
,
so i talked
she talked
and then if she was my type
i wouldve..
.
ya know
yep.
ur right
.
that
but
no
i did not
not even a kiss night-ers
just a goodbye
and
u should give me a call
damn
i love my lame life
so
yes my first experience as a
1st time dater went ok
but i think i like alone
and alone
is ok
right????????

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

pretty darn sure

i was at good food store
it reminded me of Gillette, WYo
why?
because there was some gansta white boys
in a ride, yo
but they were bumpin shit yo
and i swear to freakin god that the song
said...
"chewy chewy bubble gum, its a party bitch"
swear to god
so.
if that is not what it said
i am stealing those bad ass yo-ster lyrics
ha
bitcheeesss

Monday, June 29, 2009

how many days

watched swingers recently
awesome but "make me feel" weird movie
meaning u feel embarrassed for them in the movie
but anyways
in the movie it explains
to wait "how many days to call"
when he gets a number from a girl
his friends say 2 or 3 days
he does it that night and it is a funny scene
.
for me.
i danced last, last weekend at the "Badlander"
and ended up dancing with
"Noel" i cute but innocent girl
i played it chiil, but drunk mode
and left, like a cool dude, ha, nono
then this last saturday i was dancing at
the "Top Hat" and ran into her again
she literally said forcefully,
"give me ur number""i want ur number"
so i still played it cool
"ok ok"
then we danced and i went outside with my awesome roomate
"miss billie"
then i forgot sort of or was playing COOL
and she came out and was leaving
and said it again
"give me ur number"
so i did
later that night, cuz when ive been raging
its been latteee
and about 2"30
i got a text saying
"thanx for the dances" noelll
so now my point is...
its been two days and i dont really care to much ya know
cuz i love being alone but
since she demanded my number
she should call, huh?
Huh? maybe but i should too
i guess if i think i was someone else
i would call cuz "you can get laid easy" as some one says
im not a fuckin bro-skeeee
so no
but i am not a creep also
so she has to per-sue me,
ha

Monday, June 22, 2009

safety song

its a song
about safety!!!!

that's right, safetyyyy!!!!

like....
-what to do when you ride a bike

-get in a car

-ride in a motorboat

that's right!!

be the SAFEST by using SAFETYYYYY!!!!!

.
.
.
that is my catch cuz i wrote a safety song
my sister thinks its a good idea for money
i myself, think it is creepy
but it is damn easy writing a children's song
and i wrote 3 other ones too
-food pyramid song
-old hound dog
-3 meals and 2 tooth-brushings ( yea i know)
-----wierd
but they are soon to be in sound
along with all my other non-creey children songs
oh yea

Monday, June 15, 2009

bending vs binge-eeng

well 3 or 4 or 5 days later
i am still alive
and now it is the start of my weekend
at 3:51 am on monday morn
i realize that a lot of things go down
even if u dont remember
music
friends
new ones too
"my" definition of party-ing
and i realized tonight at me friends house that
scott james parker
has came along way
in name speaking wise
01. scott
02. scotty
03. scotty p
04. scotty pee
05. scotty pee pants
06. pee pants
07. pants

wow, thank you chad
and thats only on bar graph/histogram
i also realized that when people meet
and call me scotty right away
i feel awkward for them
not just me
when i say.
"hi im scott"
you say, "hi SCOTT, im ______"
scotty is for comfortable people
not you, or her, or him
but you
and my eyes are getton ick.
ok ok
me tired now
night night

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

1st time for everything

-it diss appeared
-no sight, no wipe
-im sure i felt it come out
-i am proud to say, of what i can remember of my past
___my first ghost pooper___
yes indeed
my first

Thursday, June 4, 2009

JJJ and lovin life

Yello

Me name be Jimmy
Jam James



I love roundin cattles on paved country roads,





Fightin with fierce "rocks"




and makin fire on rocks




that is what i, Jimmy Jam James

love best

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

in my darkness

in the darkness....
-i look ravid
-my ab-yul-clar musk-els look fit
-my chest hair is lighter in dark-ened light
-my hand skin is dominate
-with out breathing, i have a perfect 6
-its only me around me-self
-i will do stomach thrutches for fun
-think that a double chin is present
-but find out it is ur neck beard forming
-i itch with about 29 miss-gee-toe bites about
=s.j.p. in the darkness
=s.j.p. in the flesh
=s.j.p..........
-can u wait
-cuz i cant...mhmm

Saturday, May 30, 2009

-why not to go to a beat boxers house-
1. beat boxing that is funny and not good
   -i try to beat box but only when im trashed with me friend greenstein
2. very shady looking house
   -messy-er than our hippie house
3. try to leave and he scary kid offers "shrooms braaa"
   -im young but old
4. it is 3 am
   -tired and want to go home
5. "my friend is a master guitarist braaaa
   -was a shredder on a acoutic yamaha
   -not a master guitarist
6. no beer, or ibupuffin
   -want to go to bed
   -staring to get ti ti
so if you think about going to a "beat boxers" house
do not do it

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

some one will be thee

i am an edible(?) piece of me
not nearly re-in-car-nation
but just re-using me
so.
i have been cooking for elder people
mostly because at a
"bed and breakfast"
old haggerds only stay there
..
..
i dont want to get old
but
when i got to these cool college parties
i am old
so ill go home or wake up or walk to
a mirror or what-not
and look
some days i am old
and some not
...
..
.
so when i cook for the elders
i am young
i dont want to get old
but
when i am doing young things
with "younger" kids
i feel old
so.
.
the whole majority of this is
wait!!!!
ok, so i dont believe what i believe
#1 i am always right but wrong
#2 you say something
-if i do agree, i dont
-if you agree, i dont
-not really opposite but the same
--sort of kind of, but not really

so back to elder thinkings

When i do happen to do what we call "die"
i want my funeral to be this
.some one will be in charge
..making sure <>
then their will be sort of a pot-luck-esk
about the whole get together
some tears
some laughter
some joy
some sorry
some hate
some warmth
.. but what the catch is....
is that they will be
pretty much re-in-car-nate-ing me
by the one in charge
that "1" will miss-tear-ee-us-lee
wisk away with my ashes
that is <>
and lets say
"randy colerdt" brought the basil tomato soup
well........
that one will ash a little ash into it
and then who ever eats eats me
so what i call that is reee-innn-carrr-naaayyyy-shunnnn
although i might have to do test run
of what people like at my parties
young or old
maybe their is a world crisis on basil or tomato
a recall perhaps
what do we all do then

although
everyone cant go wrong with
SPARKED WATER
mmm
so refreshed
and
that human that dabbled a gander of me
no will have,
not sure the percentage but
some part of me in him/her/it

if you could only then zoom in
to some part of them
then you would see those hard workin labor machines
being lubed with scott james parker
and damned be right
when i go, i want to be else where
other than
digging through the soil parts trying to be free
i want to be runing a-mass about another person
not really my dream girls but anyone
crack heads
lezbee-anns
god
whatever
just so i am free
so i will be other than thee
nighters!!

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

elevators

so when i was visiting my friend casey
in denver
he new "the way" for elevators
how to go about elevator situations
when you enter, usually you dont say much
you stand and look down then up and straight
everytime he would get in and there was someone
he would strike a random question
then they would be weirded out
well anyways
i tried it while going to the hospital to pay a fee
luckly she was old cuz im sure she loved it
and then i parted ways and used $365.87

make sure you have health insurance

Thursday, May 21, 2009

where are you?

dear thesaurus,
where are you so i can write more to a new song

dear scott,
somewhere, i am.. but not far

dear thesaurus,
are you pert-near?

dear scott,
yes i am within reach of two of you

dear thesaurus,
so if im 6'2" 1/2 then you are 13 away

dear scott,
yes, but closer than you think..

dear thesaurus,
that must be trick question

dear scott,
maybe too close

dear thesaurus,
i found you. you are in my brain.

dear scott,
good, good. you have found thee

dear thesaurus,
goodnight, good friend

dear thesaurus,
good night....

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

i swear that if i believed in a god
it would say
"Scott, you are superstitious my son"
why?

because lights turn off right when i think about them
-i walk on campus and the lights turn off right as i pass them
-i walk in my house and i look back, what do u think happens
--the street light turns off

i have to put on my left shoe or socks, always
-it has been years since the right one went on first
-if i start to do the right, i take however far i got and go in reverse
-anything down there goes on left to right

i have to always sleep with a thick blanket
-summer, i sleep with a big quilt, i dont care about sweat
-i do this because when i was younger, my sister told me
-"Scott, trolls will sneak at the end of ur bed and rip your pinky toenails off"
-so i started tucking feet under the blankets, whole body included
-that was probably 18-19 years ago
-no, i am not a wuss, i just want to keep my toenails

i am super-duper-stitious

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

graduation monday...
oh wait, no more graduation
it more or less is the "days of our lives"
so yes it is 4:23 am in the morn
ive been havin fun okkkkk
i walked my baby big breast home
that is my upright bass for no one that knows
a lot of occurences occured
i thought it was around 1 am
and it was 3:41 when i left for my journey
my bass on back and guitar on hand
i wished i had some "hot chip"
on my musical phone
instead of some crunch-ee "hot chip"
i had
AIR
good but not as good
so i walkedd
me and my bass and my guitar
and kaetlyn and mysterious walked with me
until "university and higgins" the mystery-er said
i walked as i got about 3 blocks away
my back hurts i exclaimed
"no worries bra, ill carry ur gee-tar"
i thought i had it but the dude insisted
so kaetlyn gave me a "bed light"
and i dis-parted at u and higgins
they were going my way so i went other,
longer ways
i think i needed to chill alone, ya know
turned at great harvest
bread
which i bought some apple crisp earlier today
and found myself looking down at a big bloch of black
it was a big ant cluster
they were just eating and building
...
i am realizing that it is
"4:32"
IN THE MORNING
...
my back of my knees hurt
cuz my stander upper bass was
tapping and rubbing and nicking
at my back knees or whatever

i think that my day off of graduation what-not
created a good/bad response
in a decision that i could make
but i dont really need too
so ill stay up and smoke a smoke
and drink and drink... of water
and try to go to bed
while i just heard my roomate's alarm beep
4:36am
damn scotty boy
late night and good times at sams/c-lo's house
now i rest and think about more
of tomarrow
...
..
.
work at 245
and make a missing of people slowly
even myself
cuz i lost me

Sunday, May 17, 2009

graduation saturday
-feel hung over
-head to "the silk road"
-drink to cure
-drink at the old post
-drink at kiwanis
-play volleyball for a long time
-feel sunburn
-drink at my house for sams partyy
-smoke to many cigs and drink alot
-no shady gestures toward anyone
-tell a story about a troll ripping your pinky toenail off
-realize i needed to go to bed
-go to bed....late
-done with drinking for sometime

Saturday, May 16, 2009

super big day

graduation friday for few of many.
-wake up hanged overed
-have heart burn from smokin, achohol, and fun
-make a moderate day at kootenai into fun climbing
-shower and start drinking again: 5pm
meet up and pick some bluegrass
meet up and pick some bluergrass
pick some bluegrss and drink
smoke some "european cigs"....
and pick some bluegrass
shots of rumplements..
and pick some bluegrss
see old lady friend and give a funny gester...
not what u think but u know
feel tired and pound a pbr outside
ride home and ears freeze off'
hate the chilly-ness
cook up last night pizza
1 slice and some garlic sause
get ready for heart burn tomarrow on 
Graduation Saturday
hope that "texting" (sexting)(mexting)(hexting)
works!!!!!!!
go to sleep now

Sunday, May 10, 2009

i had a new bitch in my bed recently
.
..
....
.
.
.
..
.
.
.
..
actually....
it was my folks
baby girl english setter
and shes a sweet heart

Friday, May 8, 2009

Double Front Chicken

James,"ive been a trekkie since the 60's"
Ben,"man, i tell you what, i have too"
Chad, "star trek is not as good as terminator"
James, "now wait a minute, ur too young to know"
Chad, "oh i know"

this is sort of the conversation that went down yesterday
some two old dudes, james and ben
and me and chad drinking at the d-front
apparently james knew wayyy to much about star trek
3 seasons, 72 episodes
and star trek the movie 1980
is the best movie ever

i am going to download that shit to make sure
i havent missed out on this

oh and "smurf piss" shots are easy to go down
but the energy drink part kept me rollin around
from 2 to 8 am.
no good
no good

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

so summer is coming for "us" students
i always dont do what i want to do all year long
what? yeah i asked it too

im talking about talking to these "dream girls"

we all have them
no matter who you are
you see them
but you never really engage in conversation

and if you do "engage"
you never proceed to anything

well, i have about ah-many of these
"dream girls" all about this town i live in
thats about in the teens or more in counting
ive always never really thought about them
until i walk past them, or engage in eye glances

Is that smile something that i should proceed too?

i never know why i dont but i do know why
i am shy, scared, not talk-a-tive

do you ever wonder if...
they are thinking what you think their thinking

i really want to list a few so i will.

1. "exotica"
-that's what she looks like
-super beautiful
-exotic and one of a kind
2."the twins"
-always see them in the gym
-dont know which is which but beautiful
-have caught a few back-glances and wondered
3."mon./wed./fri/ 5 o'clock work out"
-she is blonde and cute
-she stole an ab work-out from me
-i am shy
-she seems shy
-i feel old sometimes
4."bus driver girl"
-i am attracted to brunette-skinny-tall
-sort of disappointed cuz i have never seen her smile
-wears "prana" gear
5."tan-a ba-nana"
-last summer, basically eff-ed danced
-friends of friends
-tall and skinny and not blonde
-stylish which i usually dislike
-never can proceed myself with anything more
...
....
.....
......
there is a lot more which i have to think of later

anyways
maybe a casting of spells upon
will make me balls up and do something
probably not
that is why dream girls are dream girls
although i never really dream about them,
i just dream of dreamt-ness

Sunday, May 3, 2009

my simplistic day of eating yesterday

-3 peanut-jelly sand-witches
-1 1/2 of a sugar cookie
-1 cheese dog from dairy queen
which is damn good after a long day
just the juices i believe are the best
healthy day that day

i am also feeling like an old man
my bones are creak-n
my musk-els are ache-n
my skin is dry-n
but my hair is not gray/grey
so i am still young
whoooo-hoooooo

Thursday, April 30, 2009

med kit

when i go climbing
i always bring the "med kit"

-dirty ass athletic tape
-kroger ibuprofen tablets
-old toothbruth
-electrical tape
-2 different grits of sandpaper
-carmex
-tool max knife
-a red and a black lighter
-spoon
-2mm p-cord
-Keuffel & Esser Co., New York 3x magnifying glass
-miscelenous airborne bottle
-and sometimes a Safeway pain reliever bottle

i guess thats whats in the kit now
sometimes i add
and sometimes i subtract things

i hope to get out of this weather
and pack the kit for some exciting times
you too could have a med kit that was just explained
just grab a random bag and fill it with shit
but dont have too much fun now!!!

Sunday, April 26, 2009

GOD

ya wanna know why i dont believe in god
because i puked last night while tryin the blood of christ
and i bled and sucked my blood
i cut myself on the blood of christ's bottle
so that didnt help
but now i dont believe

because i had a huge understanding before that

Thursday, April 23, 2009


come on over
im makin dinner
maybe some nook-chops (my roomates dog)
or some greta-chops (my roomates dog)
mhm, tasty treats

the map on the back of her back

so after the yonder show tonight,
i rode my "fuji" '71 back to my homestead......

ya know that buildin
in deadwood, sd
it is possibly titled
"morning star"

it involves kevin costner
and the 3rd floor, i believe

it has memorable item from his movies
such as....
-Waterworld
my supered favorite movie of ago
but what i do remember is the other one
it was a bike-n movie

that is how i felt tonight
.no music
.legs-a-burnin
.one tracked mind
.prayin to the lord hey-zeus
.
it was intense
i guess i sort of had an idea of
-get home, go to bed, dream,
maybe wake up during the sleepage,
go back asleep, wake-up,
live a lively life.....that day,today,tomarrow

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

sjp

ha, do you love life?
..
..
..
..
cuz i sure am!!!!

im love-n the life im like-n
and like-n the love of life
im live-n the life
and like-n the love
and like love im live-n life

someday i will (earn) a recorder
and record my recordings
that are recorded in my records
or my mind.

or

(sing)
i hope i trust my heart aches
and my homeplace too
where i dream
and seem to hide
and find things i do

...sparker (r)

ya know how you have a mother.

well my name wouldve been
S. James Jelle
if somehow i didn't acquire my fathers last name
that wouldve been cool
maybe i should start reply-ing to only

St. James (saint james)
S.J.
J.P.

but im stuck with that thing you get when your born
or i could get it legally changed
but that requires some time

so
it goes

1st-my father's father's middle name

2nd-my mother's father's first name

3rd-my father's father's father's father's (etc.) last name

and you create and say "me"

Friday, April 17, 2009

mebody

im pretty sure my body was put together by
!!!!ALIENS!!!
what a suprise

These damn dis-pra-por-tion-it arms
... and feet
... and ears
i seem to look less like me-self

or the ole' brain
is a tickin-
and a talkin
toward somethin

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Namit

if i was to become a solo artist
or
something like that
i was thinking of some names for a band...

+Scotty and Pea-Pods - (could be the "million dollar" children singer name)
+Scott James and the Restaurant Riders

(beau barkley thought of this punk band name back in the day)
-+SASC= sexually active senior citizens
(beau barkley thought of this metal band name back in the day)
-+Satan's Death Ship
...yes... memory is a great thing
...yes... they are great names

+Parked Her
-a musical style inner-twined with
1. Motley Crue
2. The Casualties
3. Sting (solo)
4. The Johnson Mountain Boys

...yes... music can do wonders
...yes...
...yes...
...yes... music can do wonders

Monday, April 13, 2009

i was wondering...

if they re-use the scissors that they cut the umbelical cord with
do you get to keep them for ever?
that could be one of those lasting moments forever, huh

my mind right NOW

6'2/3
154.7
maybe should change up the eatings
not a problem, just metab-olism
love eggs but with only a few yolks
for that heart of mine
healthy looking
feel great
all in all i am scott james
probably the 1st not the 3rd
but one damn good individual
of the parker heir
handsome too
need a hair shavin pretty soon
tick season here in mt.
not yet, but soon
my once a year doing

Saturday, April 11, 2009

belay games















Dean 'n' I r trying to free "Poison FLower"
A2+ or 11+ they say

the above picture is when
you find out that your camera ZOOMS in

Throughout the week my fingers get
sore-er,
and sore-er
and sore-er
but "I just cant get enough"
i love it because its an
-activity
-hobby
-sport
and keeps me fit

156

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

doo-op-a

i was thinking about one hit wonders the other day,
and today
Some that are examined as "one hit wonders"
are "really rad-a-cious-bra"
Like Devo.
Have you actually listened to them,
and not "Whip It" or "Working in a Coal Mine"
They are bad ass.
Crunchy-Granola-Grooves!!
no way of one hit wonders there
or
how bout Green Jelly
and not "Three Little Pigs"
They are bad ass TOO.
did you ever listen to that song, Teenage Rage
or something like that
That influenced my teenage years
and
when ur a kid and you hear things ur not supposed to,
you put a secret smile on ur face
IT IS WEIRD, I KNOW.

That's what makes people tickle
or "what-not" inside
I've been also wondering for a while now,
on a definition of "NORMAL"
What is normal?
me, oh who knows.

there isnt one cuz nothing is normal?
cuz what is normal to human beings persuasions

god
8-5
love
soup slurping
HIV
socializing

normal smormal
i guess its what you think it is?
UNLESSSS......

You think different!!!!!!!

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

go team

i was asked if i voted for obama
i told them "I'm Republican by blood."

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Montana=LoloPass=Coolness


This Could Be Why Montana Rocks and YOU Suck
or
Everyone is Cool and Montana Sucks
or
I Should Move Back to WYO cuz WYO is the Best
or
Everything is the Same as It Was Before This
or
Not

Friday, April 3, 2009

Rock, Paper, SIZZERsssss

What do you think you are?
-Rock
-Paper
-Sizzerrr


Personality check
Rock - smashes the shit out of scissor
- yet gets humiliated by paper

Scissor - cuts the shit out of paper
- gets smashed horribly by rock

Paper -humiliates rock by something like,
"Lays a thin layer around the rock?"
or
"Suffocates the rock?"
-gets the shit cut our of him by scissor

whats with paper
the other two are violent when they seek others
paper just either does something no one really knows about
or is a sly feller

so what are you?
Not sure here but I am deciding
"

LB-age

i have been losing poundage lately
its for climbing nothin else
not poundage, but body fat

got ta get down, got ta get down
or
got ta get up, got ta get up

losing is like angels pushing you up that shit
you feel light as shit

also, im the most non-religious-religious person

sort of like those enviro's that do everything right
but
do everything wrong

Recycling


i guess i wrenched down on a finger-crack
i had a whole bunch of non-sensitivity through out my body
this always happens when you touch terra firma

you look down and your fingers
always seem to be bleedin

member when you were a kid....
and you cut urself
for some sweet reason
you decide to drink your own blood
"too much will give you a stomach ache"

maybe those damn enviro's should realize...

Is drinking your blood mean that you ReCyCle?

Cuz I'm not that much into that recycling stuff
probably cuz i live in a real recycle-ee town

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Colt 45

The other day i dropped in South Ave. Market
sounds like a cool place but it is only a gas station
I was deciding on some cold beverage
when something popped out!!!
COLT 45
and in 16 oz cans
i was damned amazed so i bought a six pack

while i was drinking this cool beverage
my roomate walked in and said,
"wow, that's right, you are from wyoming."
hmmm, thanks bud

he asked what it tastes like

was i supposed to pour it in a pint glass
swirl it around and smell before tasting
nope, i said it tastes like beer, noooo shit
then we thought that colt 45 must be all the beer companies combined
pabst, schmidts, coors, bud, keystone, and high gravity (for that dark taste)
it sure tastes like that i guess
a mix of goodness for sure

i hope they keep selling that shit cuz i will buy it all the time
only $4.49 a six pack
with no sales tax too
god i love montana

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

School=None=1 Week

So its half-way between spring-break
woohooooo spring break 09 baby
cancun yeahhhhh parrtttttyyyyy

actually, i just got back from smith rock, oreeegon
weather turned sour today so we headed back.
but i got 3 days of some excellent climbing in
i went with one of my roomates "Greenstein"
no he's no Jewish but convince him that he is
he also needs some damn cat-nip or something for his ADD
being in a car with him for 9 hours is something else
then you get home and you live with him, ohhhh yeah
great times

Now i have another half week to hang out
might go see the little feller my sister popped out almost 2 years ago on april 11th
Well, my roomates are blabbin about fire, and i hate that shit
so i cant really write right now, ahhhhhh

Thursday, March 26, 2009

My Lifetime Art Piece


the other day i was sittin around playin some tunes
and i thought of an idea on how to make millions
AND create an art piece
you remember that creepy guy Raffe or Raphie
he was that children entertainer that was very eerie but homely
if your not sure who he is or just need a refresher, look IT up anyways, i was screwin around and pretty much felt "a Raffee" come out from the depths
so hopefully, "James-ee", (that's gonna be my name)
will make it and become famous
throughout the years i will entertain kids and their loving parents
through a learning process of dialogue and singing tunes like:

Me, "that looks like a fossil there. do you all know what a fossil is?"
Children and parents, "No!!!!"
Me, "Well would you like to know what a fossil is?"
Children and parents, "Yeahhhhh!!!"
Me Singing, "Wellllll, a fossil is a thing from the past,
That scientist's get to look way back,
On time that is."
Me, "You all know what time is?"
Children and parents, "YEahhhhh/NOoooo!!!"
Me Singing, "Wellllll, time is a measuring system,
For sequencing events.......
Oh Boy, that seems like some bigs words, huh.
Well don't worry,
That's what growing up is all about,
(yell) LEARNINGGGGG!!!!!!"

then hopefully at the hieght of my career
i will have a huge festival based around "James-ee and His Learning Tales of Life"
This is where my whole art piece would end
I would make sure that there is a whole shit load of people,
mostly kids with their parents
all 100,00 loving families bunched up getting ready for my festival
i would start off about 10 minutes with my normal routine
of learning about the earth and body and shit
then when everyone is least expecting
"James-ee" the loving children figure,
would make sure they remembered that moment for the rest of their lives

Me, "Are you all having fun today?"
Children and parents, "Yeaaaaaaa!!!!!!!"
Me, "Well that's just great because I'm having a wonderful time too!!"
Children and parents, "(lots of cheering)"
Me, "How 'bout you turn to your parents and give them a big hug"
Children and parents,"(smiles and joy while embracing their loving folks)"
give them a minute or so

Me, "Do you kids wanna know how you were made?"
Children, "YEAHHHHH!!!!"
Me, "Well the story about the stark carring you in a basket is a lie"
Parents, "(Gasping and questioned looks)"
Me singing, "Your dad put it in your mom,
On the night of their prom
They didn't want to have ya
But that was the churches choice
Now they love you and you love them"
Parents and Children, "(Screaming and scampering for safety)"
I would hopefully guess that the sound guy would be on myside,
as part of the art piece, of course
because i dont want the mic to be turned off
While the families are going nuts and throwing shit
and trying to run out of the squished festival
i would keep on going on about rude things that are supposivly not "right" for children's ears like

-has your dad ever yelled at your mom? or
-do you think of your sister or mommy in funny but wierd ways? or
-do you always twitch?
-well that might be because your mom did tweak in the 80's during her punk rock era (or) -you are a meth baby and there is nothing to do about it other than "not do meth"


then while all the craze and anger is going on for some time
i would thank them very much for all the great years
and "thank you for particapating in my art piece,
it was a lifetime achivement"
so i would make millions and then not really ruin their childhood,
but make them think hard about their lives
probably get sued but oh well.
well that is my somewhat idea on how to make millions- if all else fails